FUN: Road rage

Friday, December 16, 2016

AN OLD ONE, BUT STILL FUNNY imho.

Busted!

A woman pulled up to a red light behind another car. The driver of the car in front of her was talking on his cell phone, and shuffling through some papers on the seat beside him.

The light turned green, but the man didn’t notice. The woman began pounding on her steering wheel and yelling at the man to move. The man still didn’t move.

The woman went ballistic inside her car, ranting and raving at the man, pounding on her steering wheel and dashboard.

The light turned yellow. The woman blew the car’s horn repeatedly, as she yelled and screamed curses at the man.

The man finally noticed the commotion. He looked up, saw the yellow light, and accelerated through the intersection just as the light turned red.

The woman was beside herself, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection. As she was still in mid-rant she heard a tap on her window and looked into the face of a very serious looking policeman.

The policeman told her to shut off her engine and step out of the car. The red-faced woman obeyed, speechless at what was happening.

The policeman then arrested the woman and took her to the police station where she was booked and placed in a cell.

After a couple of hours the woman was escorted back to the booking desk where the original officer was waiting with her personal effects.

The policeman handed her the bag containing her things, and said, “I’m really sorry for this mistake. But you see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn and screaming and cursing. Then I noticed the *Choose Life* license plate holder, the *Follow Me to Sunday School* bumper sticker, and the chrome plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally I assumed that you had stolen the car. Have a blessed day!”

 

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FUN: Actress Susan Dey is 64!!!!!!!!

Saturday, December 10, 2016

2016-Dec-10

Today’s Birthdays: Former Agriculture Secretary Clayton Yeutter (YEYE’-tur) is 86. Actor Tommy Kirk is 75. Actress Fionnula Flanagan is 75. Pop singer Chad Stuart (Chad and Jeremy) is 75. Rhythm-and-blues singer Ralph Tavares is 75. Actress-singer Gloria Loring is 70. Pop-funk musician Walter “Clyde” Orange (The Commodores) is 70. Country singer Johnny Rodriguez is 65. Actress Susan Dey is 64. Former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich is 60. Jazz musician Paul Hardcastle is 59. Actor-director Kenneth Branagh (BRAH’-nah) is 56. Actress Nia Peeples is 55. TV chef Bobby Flay is 52. Rock singer-musician J Mascis is 51. Rock musician Scot (cq) Alexander (Dishwalla) is 45. Actress-comedian Arden Myrin is 43. Rock musician Meg White (The White Stripes) is 42. Actress Emmanuelle Chriqui is 41. Rapper Kuniva (D12) is 41. Actor Gavin Houston is 39. Violinist Sarah Chang is 36. Rock musician Noah Harmon (Airborne Toxic Event) is 35. Actor Patrick John Flueger is 33. Actress Raven-Symone is 31.

# – # – # – # – #  2016-Dec-10 @ 15:51  

Today’s Birthdays: Former Agriculture Secretary Clayton Yeutter (YEYE’-tur) is 86. Actor Tommy Kirk is 75. Actress Fionnula Flanagan is 75. Pop singer Chad Stuart (Chad and Jeremy) is 75. Rhythm-and-blues singer Ralph Tavares is 75. Actress-singer Gloria Loring is 70. Pop-funk musician Walter “Clyde” Orange (The Commodores) is 70. Country singer Johnny Rodriguez is 65. Actress Susan Dey is 64. Former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich is 60. Jazz musician Paul Hardcastle is 59. Actor-director Kenneth Branagh (BRAH’-nah) is 56. Actress Nia Peeples is 55. TV chef Bobby Flay is 52. Rock singer-musician J Mascis is 51. Rock musician Scot (cq) Alexander (Dishwalla) is 45. Actress-comedian Arden Myrin is 43. Rock musician Meg White (The White Stripes) is 42. Actress Emmanuelle Chriqui is 41. Rapper Kuniva (D12) is 41. Actor Gavin Houston is 39. Violinist Sarah Chang is 36. Rock musician Noah Harmon (Airborne Toxic Event) is 35. Actor Patrick John Flueger is 33. Actress Raven-Symone is 31.


FUN: The Lone Ranger and Tonto were at the bar … …

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

http://www.winkman.com/myspace/loneranger.html

 

*** begin quote ***

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were at the bar drinking, when in walks a cowboy who yells, “Who’s white horse it that outside?”

The Lone Ranger finishes off his whiskey, slams down the glass, turns around and says, “It’s my horse. Why do you want to know?”

The cowboy looks at him and says, “Well, your horse is standing out there in the sun and he don’t look too good.”

The Lone Ranger and Tonto run outside and they see that Silver is in bad shape, suffering from heat exhaustion. The Loan Ranger moves his horse into the shade and gets a bucket of water. He then pours some of the water over the horse and gives the rest to Silver to drink.It is then he notices that there isn’t a breeze so he asks Tonto if he would start running around Silver to get some air flowing and perhaps cool him down.

Being a faithful friend, Tonto starts running around Silver. The Lone Ranger stands there for a bit then realizes there is not much more he can do, so he goes back into the bar and orders another whiskey.

After a bit a cowboy walks in and says, “Who’s white horse is that outside?”

Slowly the Lone Ranger turns around and says, “That is my horse, what is wrong with him now?”

“Nothing,” replies the cowboy, “I just wanted to let you know that you left your Injun running.”

*** end quote ***


FUN: The Cubs “curse”?

Sunday, October 30, 2016

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3886500/Baseball-Indians-win-Series-title-rout-Cubs.html

Is the Cubs curse back? Famous fans watch as Chicago team falls 3-1 to the Indians in their historic battle to win the World Series

By REUTERS and ASSOCIATED PRESSPUBLISHED: 23:22 EST, 29 October 2016 | UPDATED: 01:15 EST, 30 October 2016

*** begin quote ***

The Cubs, appearing in the World Series for the first time in 71 years and looking for their first title since 1908, were on the brink of elimination after a lackluster display in their second successive loss before a hushed Wrigley Field crowd. 

*** end quote ***

Of course, the article never mentions the curse. How can we decide if it’s back if it’s not explained.

Does any rational being believe in “curses”? I thought the highpoint of this particular meme (i.e., a paradigm spread like a gene or virus from person to person) was Salem Witchcraft.

Last I looked the alchemists hadn’t change lead into gold. And heaven help us if they do.

As a fat old white guy injineer, I believe in facts and evidence.

No excuse me while I sprinkle some of that spilled salt over my left shoulder.

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FUN: Where’s the fish?

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Bearpool

 
… thought this was funny.
 
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FUN: Sir Paul @ Metlife

Monday, August 8, 2016

2016-Aug-07

Mccartney

AFTER ACTION REPORT

Concert scheduled for 8PM. Traffic getting in SOOoo bad, I assume Sir Paul delayed until 8:30. (Lot of complaints about the traffic, patterns, and drop off points.

Made it at 8:15PM.

Great seats! (Anna Marie Henno is a great seat picker.)

They make you always go up 35+ rows instead of down 2 to the floor level concessions. Argh!

Traffic from shore disaster. 1015 traffic was late saying that 33 was closed. GSP, 9, and 34 were all mess. Argh.

And despite $11 beer and $10 wine, everyone was having a great time.

I think that Metlife stadium bureaucrats need to reexamine their traffic planning.

  • Taxis and limos had to drop in the K lot 15 minute walk from the stadium.
     
  • Buses were only a few step closer.
     
  • Tailgaters had the close in lots “occupied” with each taking several spots.
  • Seems like taking the train in is the best strategy with the least walking.

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FUN: Lily and Marshall pause

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

https://youtu.be/sYxfSXnDoFU

Lily and Marshall pause

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Many a true word comes on comedy shows!

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