FUN: Don’t you just love secret compartments

Saturday, March 23, 2013

http://www.urlesque.com/2010/07/19/hidden-compartments/

But how does one keep them secret?

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Ahhh young love is vunderbar

Sunday, February 24, 2013

HAD lunch with the bride-elect and the groom-to-be. And spare, spare’s lovely gal pal, Mom, and H. 

Argh! 

Makes me feel very very old.

Too bad Our Girl was called away early, I KNOW she’d have been joyous.

Tentative calendar entry 10-1×-2014!

Mozel Tov!

(Wonder if the wedding meme is contagious among eligible young women? Like when the hold babies, suddenly each one wants one of their own? It’s like the biological clock goes into a spin cycle! Similar to male menopause and sympathetic pregnancy?)

Two diverse memes!

# – # – # – # – #  2013-Feb-24 @ 21:32  


FUN: Found the drivers license I misplaced

Saturday, February 23, 2013

I know I am ready for the home.

Remember I misplaced my new DL about a week after getting it?

Found it today!

Three guesses where.

Nope, nope, nope … … give up?

BEHIND the toilet?

How it got there I have no idea?

How long it could have remained there is an “interesting” question.

Argh!

Now where is my cellphone?

Behind the spare tire in the car? There is a spare tire in the car, right? They still have those. 

Just the other day, I went to the gas station, got a gallon of gas for 30 cents, and the attended washed the windows … …

… … in my dreams!

Argh!

Maybe I am in the home and this is all a dream?

Are we having pudding after dinner?

Argh!

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: @tswift13 is getting hotter

Friday, February 22, 2013

http://youtu.be/bEh2iECS0To

wish I was young again!

–30–


FUN: TBBT “the cat’s alive”

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schrödinger’s_cat

An absolutely great episode!

–30–


FUN: “Today a girl is going to touch you in your special place!”

Sunday, February 17, 2013

TBBT: Love that show. Go, Penny, go!

–30–


FUN: Bud and Lou (version 2.0)

Saturday, February 16, 2013

>> You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and not too
>> old
>> to understand computer basics to fully appreciate this. If Bud Abbott and
>> Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, “Who’s on First?”
>> might have turned out something like this.
>>
>>
>> COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT
>>
>> ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
>>
>> COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking
> about
>> buying a computer.
>>
>> ABBOTT: Mac?
>>
>> COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.
>>
>> ABBOTT: Your computer?
>>
>> COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.
>>
>> ABBOTT: Mac?
>>
>> COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.
>>
>> ABBOTT: What about Windows?
>>
>> COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
>>
>> COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
>>
>> ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
>>
>> COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write
> proposals
>> track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Office.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
>>
>> ABBOTT: I just did.
>>
>> COSTELLO: You just did what?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Recommend something.
>>
>> COSTELLO: You recommended something?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Yes.
>>
>> COSTELLO: For my office?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Yes.
>>
>> COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Office.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
>>
>> ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
>>
>> COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m
>> sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Word.
>>
>> COSTELLO: What word?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Word in Office
>>
>> COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
>>
>> ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
>>
>> ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue “W”.
>>
>> COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue “w” if you don’t start with some
>> straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I
> can
>> track my money with?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Money.
>>
>> COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Money.
>>
>> COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
>>
>> ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
>>
>> COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Money.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
>>
>> COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
>>
>> ABBOTT: One copy.
>>
>> COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
>>
>> COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
>>
>> (A few days later)
>>
>> ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
>>
>> COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
>>
>> ABBOTT: Click on “START”…..
>>
>

 

–30–


FUN: Co-workers dining

Thursday, February 14, 2013

 

2013 02FEB 13 DA D DINNER

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: 2013 Budweiser Super Bowl Ad — The Clydesdales: “Brotherhood”

Saturday, February 2, 2013

http://youtu.be/o2prAccclXs

I’d call “clyde”?

–30–


FUN: Ferd Appreciation Day

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

2013-01JAN-22 Ferd appreciation

 

Everyone is a comedian. Not nice to make fun of the “old man”!

Just because I wouldn’t tell them my real birthday, they assigned me one.

Birthdays are SAD!

–30–


FUN: Swift makes a wish come true

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

http://www.theindychannel.com/entertainment/taylor-swift-enjoys-lunch-with-cancerstricken-fan_53249028

Taylor Swift enjoys lunch with cancer-stricken fan

Posted: 01/22/2013

Last Updated: 2 hours ago

Country star TAYLOR SWIFT enjoyed a long lunch with a cancer-stricken fan in Michigan on Saturday (19Jan13) after hearing about the teenager’s tragic plight.

The Love Story hitmaker became aware of 17-year-old Kayla Kincannon’s year-long battle with brain cancer and her burning ambition to meet the star after her family and friends launched an online campaign to get the singer’s attention.

Swift and her mother spent the afternoon with Kayla and her family before presenting the teen with a gift basket and signed photos.

***

noblisse oblige

i love a classy broad!

***


FUN: Precise Mathematics

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

LUDDITE supplies some more (sort of adult) humor!

# – # – #  

I always did like math! ROFL

*** begin quote *** 

Subject: Precise Mathematics – BRILLIANT!

Mathematics:

This comes from 2 maths teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. Experience.
It has an indisputable mathematical logic.
It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint..
it goes like this:

What Makes 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they
are giving more than 100%? We have all been
to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

What makes up 100% in life?

Here’s a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that whileHard work and Knowledge will get you close, andAttitudewill get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

Now you know why some people are where they are!

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Car video teaches me a serious lesson!

Monday, January 14, 2013

http://www.geekosystem.com/sinkhole-eats-car/

Om Nom Nom: Watch As This Sinkhole Completely Devours A Car [Video]
via Geekosystem by Ian Chant on 1/11/13

# – # – #  

Certainly a lesson to anyone who drives into a water covered road. Also, makes the case for carrying a metal cable and rachet. That fellow probably could have saved his car with such equipment. If not save, delay the inevitable while he got his stuff out. Make one think that while this was slow, it could have been much faster; with more disasterous consequences.

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Birthday wishes from my new “friends” at Social Security; probably want to kill me as cheaply as possible!

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Dear FERDINAND J REINKE,

Happy Birthday from Medicare! We wish you well in the upcoming year and want to remind you of the preventive services Medicare offers to help you stay healthy.

Our records show that you have not taken advantage of some of the preventive services which are available to you now or in the future and listed in the table below.

Month/Year Preventive Service Name and Due Date
January PROSTATE(01/12) PSA(01/12) COLORECTAL(01/12) PPV(01/12) PHYSICAL(01/12) CARDIOVASCULAR(01/12) DIABETES(01/12) ABDOMINAL AORTIC ANEURYSM(01/12) ANNUAL WELLNESS VISIT(01/13) CARDIOVASCULAR DISEASE (BEHAVIORAL THERAPY)(01/12) DEPRESSION SCREENING(01/12) OBESITY COUNSELING(01/12) HIGH INTENSITY BEHAVIORAL COUNSELING(01/12)
February
March
April
May
June
July
August
September
October
November
December

To see more details of the services you are eligible for, visit www.MyMedicare.gov and select “Preventive Services” under the “My Health” tab. Or, talk to your doctor for more information.

Remember, Medicare is your partner in health.

Sincerely,
Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services.

Please do not reply to this email, as we are not able to respond to messages sent to this address.

This e-mail was sent by Centers of Medicare and Medicaid Services based upon the request in your MyMedicare.gov profile. To stop receiving e-mails,please unsubscribe from our mailing list by signing in to www.mymedicare.gov and clicking on the “My Account” link in the banner.


FUN: Taylor Swift is #1 in something that really counts

Thursday, December 27, 2012

‘Celebs gone good': Taylor Swift named most charitable celebrity of 2012 after $4M donation

By DAILY MAIL REPORTER

PUBLISHED: 22:57 EST, 25 December 2012 | UPDATED: 23:32 EST, 25 December 2012

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2253258/Taylor-Swift-named-charitable-celebrity-2012.html#ixzz2GBg4y6td

–30–


FUN: “What you’ve never seen a hypocrite before?”

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

“What you’ve never seen a hypocrite before?”
– ‘The Big Bang Theory’ Character Leonard
    played by Johnny Galecki in
    ‘The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis’ 12/15/2008

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Ebenezer is my “hero”!

Monday, December 24, 2012

http://lewrockwell.com/shaffer/shaffer93.html

The Case for Ebenezer

by Butler Shaffer

*** begin quote ***

Taking my client as the miserable fellow Dickens has presented him, let me be the first to admit that if Ebenezer’s obsession with materialistic pursuits rendered him an unhappy person, and were it the purposes of his detractors to help extricate him from his self-imposed miseries and to restore him to that state of happiness and innocence so common to most of us in our childhood years, no one would be happier than I. But it is not my client’s happiness that the prosecution endeavors to obtain, but his money. The case against Ebenezer Scrooge is nothing more than a well-orchestrated, vicious conspiracy to extort from my client as much of his money as can be acquired through terror, threats of his death, and other appeals to fear. The only happiness that ensued to my client from this campaign arose from the ultimate cessation of terror inflicted upon him. Like the victim of any crime, the termination of wrongdoing offers a momentary relief that can be mistaken for pleasure, but it is an illusion. Such is the only happiness that Mr. Dickens has in mind for my client.

Make no mistake about it: my client has been the victim of a cruel criminal conspiracy to extort his money, as well as of such torts as intentional infliction of emotional distress, libel and slander, trespass, assault, malicious prosecution, battery, nuisance, and false imprisonment. To that end, my client may elect to bring his own suit, but for now let us focus upon his defense to this action. As we do so, pay particular attention to the uttercontradiction underlying Dickens’ case: my client is charged with being a greedy, money-hungry scoundrel, and yet it is the conspirators against him who want nothing more thanhis money! Scrooge – unlike his antagonists – earned his money in the marketplace by satisfying the demands of customers and clients who continue to do business with him, and did not, as far as we are told, resort to terror or threats of death to get it. Perhaps Dickens does no more, here, than engage in psychological projection. In doing so, he reminds us of the definition of a “selfish” person as “one who puts his greedy interests ahead of mine!”

*** end quote ***

And, a “bahhh humbug” to all!

–30–


FUN: Why do girls …

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Out while being a dirty old man, a very young lady came and sat next to me. Maybe 12-14 years old. Before she sat down, she pulled up her jeans. No belt. Obviously, the pants sag as she walk. Not a hefty enough figure to hold them up. (Hey, it’s physics!)

So what’s wrong with wearing a belt or suspenders?

Just asking.

I never see Taylor Swift pull at her trou or dress. (She has people for that!)

Sigh!

Too old and too practical.

Gals, that tug and wiggle ain’t kool,

– 30 –


FUN: Scored a triple today!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Happy to report I completed a “triple” today. That’s SIX more bags to add. I’ll update my scoreboard over the weekend!

No shaving until Monday!

–30–


FUN: Taylor Swift’s RED Keds

Thursday, October 25, 2012

http://store.taylorswift.com/Taylor-Swift-RED-Keds/dp/B009SDUIES

… but they don’t come in 10 and a half triple e’s?

What’s an old swiftie to do?

— 30 —


FUN: Maxine’s bird feeder

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Now Luddite’s wife is spamming me with these inet memes. This one hit the mark. Pretty funny. (I have high standards for my blog. Has to have that “me facing life quality”. I chuckled and thought: “How many hearts and minds can I influence?”

“Bravo Zulu” to Luddite’s wife.

# – # – # – # – #   

 

 Leave it to Maxine to come up with a solution
For the mess that America is now in economically.



2012 10 13 maxine


I bought a bird feeder. I hung It on my back porch and filled
It with seed. What a beauty of A bird feeder it was, as I filled it,
Lovingly with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds
Taking advantage of the
Continuous flow of free and
Easily accessible food.

But then the birds started
Building nests in the boards
Of the patio, above the table,
And next to the barbecue.

Then came the poop. It was
Everywhere: on the patio tile,
The chairs, the table ..
Everywhere!

Then some of the birds
Turned mean. They would
Dive bomb me and try to
Peck me even though I had
Fed them out of my own
Pocket.

And others birds were
Boisterous and loud. They
Sat on the feeder and
Squawked and screamed at
All hours of the day and night
And demanded that I fill it
When it got low on food.

After a while, I couldn’t even
Sit on my own back porch
Anymore. So I took down the
Bird feeder and in three days
The birds were gone. I cleaned
Up their mess and took down
The many nests they had built
All over the patio.

Soon, the back yard was like
It used to be ….. Quiet, serene….
And no one demanding their
Rights to a free meal.

Now let’s see.
Our government gives out
Free food, subsidized housing,
Free medical care and free
Education, and allows anyone
Born here to be an automatic
Citizen.

Then the illegal’s came by the
Tens of thousands. Suddenly
Our taxes went up to pay for
Free services; small apartments
Are housing 5 families; you
Have to wait 6 hours to be seen
By an emergency room doctor;
Your child’s second grade class is
Behind other schools because
Over half the class doesn’t speak
English.

Corn Flakes now come in a
Bilingual box; I have to
‘press one ‘ to hear my bank
Talk to me in English, and
People waving flags other
Than ‘Old Glory’ are
Squawking and screaming
In the streets, demanding
More rights and free liberties.

Just my opinion, but maybe
it’s time for the government
To take down the bird feeder.

If you agree, pass it on; if not,
Just continue cleaning up the poop
and still paying for it all with no return benefits..

   




IN GOD WE TRUST

# – # – #  

Many a true word is said in a joke. I thought this was funny and “actionable”.

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Luddite submits a “gas” joke!

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Every once in a while, Luddite comes up with a good one!!!

LUDDITE GAS PRICES

 

Yeah, and there’s no inflation!

# – # – # – # – #   


FUN: Wonder how many authors there are? 4691!

Friday, October 12, 2012

 

Dear ferdinand j. reinke,

 

Today we have added a new feature, Amazon Author Rank,

the definitive list of best-selling authors on Amazon.com. This list makes it easy for readers to discover the best-selling authors on Amazon.com overall and within a selection of major genres.

Your Amazon Author Rank:

4691 in Science Fiction

Amazon Author Rank is your rank based on the sales of all of your books on Amazon.com. Just like Amazon Best Sellers, it is updated hourly. The top 100 authors overall and the top 100 in selected genres will be displayed on Amazon.com. You can see your Amazon Author Rank trended over time inAuthor Central.

You can find your Amazon Author Rank in Author Central under the Rank tab. Historical rank data is available from September 28, 2012.

We’re always interested in feedback, so please let us know what you think.

The Author Central Team

https://authorcentral.amazon.com

P.S. You may have friends who are authors; feel free to pass this email along to them.

Amazon Author Rank is a feature available to all authors registered in Author Central.

 

FUN: “Greasy Spoon” badge

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

LOL! Another meaningless inet thing.

Congrats! Your recent check-in at 29 Diner just unlocked the Greasy Spoon badge, Level 3!

Sticky vinyl booths, bottomless mugs of joe, apple pie fresh out of the display case… Does that waitress have syrup on her hairnet? Sounds like diner heaven to us. Now, treat yourself to onion rings. Or a milkshake. We suggest both.

You’ve been to 10 different diners! The next level is only 5 more new diners away! Milkshake city!

 

FUN: Met with Newt And Callista

Monday, October 8, 2012

Two very gracious people!

 

NewImage

NewImage


FUN: Swift gets the last laugh

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Horace Mann School for the Deaf in Allston gets a personal gift from Taylor Swift
Boston.com

The local public school made national news in August when internet trolls on 4chan and Reddit began nominating Horace Mann to win a Papa John’s and Chegg-sponsored contest that would send pop singer Taylor Swift to perform at the school with the …

#####

You have to admit that the inet trolls have a sense of humor!

That’s “my” girl. She’ to savvy. (Or her marketing team is?) To let this “challenge” go unanswered.

I’d still suggest that she do the concert. What better way to insure she’s “america’s sweetheart”.

I wouldn’t make a big deal of it. Maybe a “surprise one” like the one at Auburn.

And it’s is close to Conor?

LOL!

(What do you want from a fat old white guy injineer with no life?)

##### #####


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,048 other followers

%d bloggers like this: