FUN: Birthday wishes from my new “friends” at Social Security; probably want to kill me as cheaply as possible!

Dear FERDINAND J REINKE,

Happy Birthday from Medicare! We wish you well in the upcoming year and want to remind you of the preventive services Medicare offers to help you stay healthy.

Our records show that you have not taken advantage of some of the preventive services which are available to you now or in the future and listed in the table below.

Month/Year Preventive Service Name and Due Date
January PROSTATE(01/12) PSA(01/12) COLORECTAL(01/12) PPV(01/12) PHYSICAL(01/12) CARDIOVASCULAR(01/12) DIABETES(01/12) ABDOMINAL AORTIC ANEURYSM(01/12) ANNUAL WELLNESS VISIT(01/13) CARDIOVASCULAR DISEASE (BEHAVIORAL THERAPY)(01/12) DEPRESSION SCREENING(01/12) OBESITY COUNSELING(01/12) HIGH INTENSITY BEHAVIORAL COUNSELING(01/12)
February
March
April
May
June
July
August
September
October
November
December

To see more details of the services you are eligible for, visit www.MyMedicare.gov and select “Preventive Services” under the “My Health” tab. Or, talk to your doctor for more information.

Remember, Medicare is your partner in health.

Sincerely,
Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services.

Please do not reply to this email, as we are not able to respond to messages sent to this address.

This e-mail was sent by Centers of Medicare and Medicaid Services based upon the request in your MyMedicare.gov profile. To stop receiving e-mails,please unsubscribe from our mailing list by signing in to www.mymedicare.gov and clicking on the “My Account” link in the banner.

2 Responses to FUN: Birthday wishes from my new “friends” at Social Security; probably want to kill me as cheaply as possible!

  1. Oh! And …

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

    :>
    Michael

  2. “High Intensity Behavioral Counseling”

    Soooo…… Meester Reinke, vee understand zat you have been eating CUPCAKES on Saturday nights!

    Do you KNOW vhat cupcakes DOO to you? Hmmmm???? Zey CLOGGGGG up zee ARRRRteRRRRies!!!!

    ::whip::lash::whip::lash::scourge::

    ANNNNNNDDD….

    Zat glass of WINE on Fridays! You are allowed TWO ounces, but on December 28th you had THREEEEEE ounces! Did you zhink vee vould not NOOOOOTICE zat, eh?

    Vellll…. veee DID noooootice it! Doooo you see zis sawed off BASEBALL BAT???

    BEND OVER!! Now vee shall move on to zee First item in zee list: Prostate 01/12!

    – Your caring Medicare Practitioner….

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