It happened in Church - October 19, 1962
Chapter Forty Four - French Miss drains John
Friday 02 Nov (continues)
Lunch-less Lunch
John was drained, but he dodged ‘question time’ yesterday. The Classmates need to drain at least there three most important questions.
Where was Marie?
That was his most important question. Not theirs.
She was probably cleaning up the mess he created.
He gull winged the crowd. And, as June had taught him the other night, he said in a slightly louder than normal voice. “Classmates, when if suits you, we will get started. Your silent attention will tell me when.” And waited. He was amazed how well that did work.
“A few items before we start. As you know this is the new and improved John. Some folks this morning learned to be careful the question you ask, someone may think you seriously want an answer. I’m invoking some new rules. … No that’s old John-speak. This truth stuff is really hard. How’d you all do it? … I’d suggest that in the interests of your time, we limit ourselves to three questions. I urge you to make them good ones. You may actually want to prepare them and agree on them in advance.”
“In the past, I have been less that honest with you. For that I have apologized. I think you have forgiven. You, of course, can have a new Speaker whenever you choose. Miss Marie calls that lack of honesty ‘lying’. While I respectfully disagree, as part of her forgiveness, I’ve promised Truth. So here goes.”
“Brother Kevin is predicting Guy Fawkes Day 05 Nov as out Exit Day. As Speaker, I call on you to be diligent in your duties and drills with this in mind. As I’ve told you before, we can not afford to waste our time in this concrete womb. When we burst forth, like birth, we can not say ‘I should have been more diligent in my prep’. That lack of diligence may kill us all. These are harsh words that the old John was afraid to tell you for fear you would not like him. The new John is loved by the Lord and can speak honestly.”
“We have many things to prepare. Some we are well along on, like Lurp. Others we haven’t started, like the recon plan of the connected building. As Speaker, I take responsibility for those mistakes and will correct them immediately with your help.”
“Good news, Miss June will be running a contest for seats in the trucks to Vermont. Want off the bus? Win one of those twelve seats. But, there is a higher risk of dying in those trucks. If the bad guys, whom we call Bravo Golfs, strike us anywhere, it will be at those trucks. I, and all your Eighths, will die if need be to protect you. But where you ride to Vermont, in some small measure, is your choice. The bus might be safer.”
“Starting today, I will have our staff meeting in the Dining Room. Calling where we eat our crats a Dining Room is so much more elegant and it will make them taste better. Trust me. Would the new John lie? Should you wish to listen in, you are welcome. I ask your cooperation in this experiment. You must be strictly silent like in Church. If you have a question, stand up. At the appropriate lull, I’ll try to answer it. While our teacher had some excellent ideas about praying during Q&A, and I sometimes do it, I will dispense with the rituals to economize on the time. While you are waiting to be recognized, please say those prayers. And, after praying, you feel the need for your question has gone, feel free to retake your seat with my thanks for your mindfulness of our very limited time.”
“We all have many things to do for us to get ready. Please be economical in your questions. With that, let’s begin:” John was for the first time totally relaxed. He looked at the clock. Seven after. He counted and pointed to the Seventh standing person. It was totally silent. They had adopted the new order like the well trained like robots they were.
Q1 This Morning
“Mister Speaker, what happened this morning? We saw a lot of crying and some shouting. Is there bad news or ill-will in the Staff.”
“No bad news or ill-will, although some of the Staff may be reassessing how they like Miss Marie’s new creation. Truthful John. We had some discovery, rediscovery, and realignment this morning. As a matter of fact my MIT - most important task - after this is to mend some fences and help bandage some mental wounds. To survive our upcoming trek, we had to clean out some mental luggage left over from pre Church Day. Throwing away old stuff is hard. Throwing away old ideas it torture. What you heard was some very fast very fast growing up. I didn’t plan it; it just sort of happened. One thing led to another. You know. First you look at the girl, then you really look at her, then you talk, then you hold hands, then you kiss, then you hold some glands, then … … I sense Miss Marie yelling. Can you hear her? It’s coming to me now … S … H … U … Whatever could she be saying. I know shut up. She says I talk too much. New john problem; old john rarely communicated. Any way, the growth spurt was unintended. Once things start, it spins away, and first thing you know the morning was gone. But it was time well spent. It will serve you well in the days to come. Painful but necessary. OK?”
Q2 Different Driving Teams
“Mister Speaker, we had set driving teams. Jeopardy Plan has those two right, but the Trek is all different. Why?”
“Needs of the Classmates trumps everything. Miss Marie wanted to be on Lurp; sorry, no. Marie was TOLD no - you should have seen that! Patting Jody’s tush was about the only think I think would have gotten a bigger reaction. Sam wanted to lead the entry into the Store Room; sorry, no. Are you seeing a pattern here? You can express your wants, hopes, and desires. If at all possible, we’ll honor them. Hence Jeopardy Driving Team #1. But, the Needs of the Classmates is paramount. In planning the Trek, we can’t afford to use all the best most-experienced Sixths driving ONE truck. We have eight things to drive; maybe ten. We need to spread that expertise, like pp&j over the whole slice of bread. So, like we told Marie, sorry the NOC (Needs of the Classmates) prevails. Marie was NOCed off Lurp, Sam was NOCed off the Store Room entry team. You’re wish to drive on the trek with your mates has been NOCed. Frankly, if you ain’t be NOCed, then you aren’t thinking big enough. I’ll ask Miss June to set up a NOCed wall by the toilets. We can record our gripes there. Armies have been doing that for years. OK?
Q3 New weapons
“Mister Speaker, we have new weapons in the armory. Who gets them?”
“Everything, and I mean everything, we have is the property of the Classmates as a group. This is a Kibbutz. Everything is subject to the NOC. We haven’t figured out the new riflemen / shooter list. I’ll yell at my S1 why not. That will be fun. I ASSUME that some shooters will move to be riflemen. That will make some openings for shooters. And, as Master Roy likes to say we then begin the Rob Peter Pay Paul process. We throw all the names and needs up against the wall and see what sticks. We have new lists just as soon as we can. OK?”
“That’s three. Let’s get to work. Guy Fawkes is coming!”
Lurp
John made his way to the Social Room in quiet thought. He was hoping to find Lurp practicing. He was, had been, and probably always would be a terrible leader. Imagine having to admit the lack of planning. Heck - first he’d have to find a more expressive word that Marie would find acceptable - short and Germanic - Germans always had good words like Ack - they sounded like the fellow or gal who invented the language had just stepped in the ’scheisse’ aka “Barbara Streisand”. He didn’t even have list of the plans he needed. What was that new expletive? His revere was ended as he blundered into the Social Room.
“Swooosh. Zip. Clang.” The noise came from the other end of the room. But the folks were standing half way across the room. He guessed that Isabella was showing off. That girl had muscle memory. So he plodded on over.
As usual, he was wrong. The lady, as the First say ‘cutting crats’, wasn’t Isabella. He’d found Marie. She was now as good as Isabella. Actually better. She had two year, thirty well placed pounds, and a foot of height. Her throws consequently had more oomph. She was a beautiful woman. But he was prejudiced.
The spell was broken when her adjutant braced and said “Attention On Deck”. All the non-Eighths braced. The adjutant was saluting him. He thought “this nonsense has to stop’! In his best Brian Donleavy on Wake Island, returned the salute and said “carry on”.
His moment of Old John spying was over, so he walked over. “Thought I’d see some Lurping going on?” he growled. Sam, looked him right it the eye, and said “You’re either early for the real Lurp or late for the substitute one.” We were just passing the time hurling some darts. Care to join us?” “Sure. Friends?” John replied and stuck out his hand saying “I wouldn’t blame you if you slapped it away.” Sam step past the hand and gave him a full body hug. Like a bear! John looked at Marie. Who frowned and gave him the bear hug sign. So he pretended he was back in the Village and hugged Sam back. He could feel that Sam had some tears flowing. Like a girl. For a moment, John was back in the village. The male-ish les hug like this. But, that was at another place and time. John let Sam dictate the timing. How does Marie do this? It’s strange. Sam broke and said “So sweetie, do you come here often.” In his best drag queen. John’s expression gave him away. Everyone burst out laughing. Sam turned to Marie and said “You were right. It rocked his socks.”
Marie came to him and gave him a polite ‘good for being seen by others’ peck but the full frontal said volumes. “You should have seen your face. I told Sam to do it. We practiced. Wasn’t he believable? You don’t have to answer that you already have.” She pulled him over to the group. Isabella has been showing Sam and me the fine art of Atlatling. Care to try?” Sure; but why do you say ‘try’? Do you want it done or not? You’re assuming I can’t.”, John would have his revenge.
“Miss Isabella, can you teach an old dog a new trick?” “Certainly, Master Speaker.” “Hold it like this and throw an upside down horse shoe.” He clumsily put a dart about ten feet out on the floor and dropped the atlatl. Isabella smelled a rat. She’d never seen anyone basically drop a stick and darts don’t fall that way. She smiled at him knowingly and said “Don’t worry it comes easy with a little practice. Hurling with someone helps. Competition brings out the best. I’d suggest a First but we don’t have one handy” The hook was set. Isabella said “Miss Marie, maybe you could hurl with John? He’s the type that needs incentive though.” Isabella walked back by Sam and stood very close to him. He put his arm around her. John raised his eyebrows at them. Isabella blushed and Sam frowned. As John turned back to the target he could see Isabella’s shoulder coding Sam. Sam had an incredulous look. Time to go fishing.
“So Miss Marie, what are the stakes?” Marie thought a moment. “When I win, I want you to stand up at Dinner and tell everyone your most embarrassing moment.” John said: “When I win, you will stand up at dinner and say ‘I will never doubt John’s ability to do anything ever again’. OK what rules? How do we know who wins?” “Most hits at ten feet.” “Nah too easy. Set the chair ten feet from the wall. Who ever get their chair closest to the wall wins?” “Done.” “So it’s a bet?” “Adjutant please set the chairs.” Marie still didn’t smell the rat. She was intent on humiliating him. For his own good of course. John did some windmills and squats. Isabella could barely contain herself. John put his index finger to his lips and smiled. Marie impatiently said “John, the targets are ready. Are you still going to do this? You can back out.” “Why don’t you go first so I can see what I have to beat? You have to give me some edge.”
She stalked to the line. That man was exasperating. She put herself ready and hurled. The dart struck true and the chair moved half way to the wall. “Good shot.” John said adding. “Marie, three words: Jack Of Spades!” With that John moved faster than she’d ever seen. His style was different than Isabella’s. He sort of twirled like a ballerina as he hurled. And he sound was different too. Instead of ‘Swooosh Zip Clang’, it was “crack spuuft clunk”. Clearly, now Marie smelled a rat. Too late. Marie didn’t even need to measure. His dart had lodged a little in the concrete.”
Isabella bounced to him saying: “Master Speaker, you hurl like a girl.” She was giddy and giggling. “How?” “Would you believe I did a year with the boleshoy in a tutu.” Sam and Marie were totally confused. Isabella bubbling explained “The atlatl record was set in 1960 by an Eighth Grade ballerina with what they are calling an ‘enchanted’ movement. You’ve now seen it. It’s weird. I can hardly describe it. My father’s been trying to even understand it. How could you possibly?” “I’m a strange kindda guy; I’m interested in human performance. I read about a record being set by a child with a stone age weapon with greater power and accuracy than all the adults could muster. I’m on it. A mechanical engineering professor has published a paper on the move about two months after she did it. He estimated that she generates twice the force of a standard throw. With a slew of equations to back it up. I spent four months trying to understand it. There are four university libraries in this neighborhood. Now that I’m out of the closet. If you can find a way to add weight to the center of the shaft, you can get 40% more force out of it.”
He walked over to Marie who was doing a slow burn. He kept getting trouble. What would be his punishment for this one? “Hi toots.” “Don’t call me toots! You lied.” “How could I lie? I literally didn’t say anything about anything.” “You faked that first shot.” She was getting red. “I knew that if I held it in a certain way it might flub, but I actually wanted a better shot. I was using a technique I discarded because of the slipping. But it would make me look more like a beginner. I thought that flub would give the show away. Beside Miss Holier Than Thou, what was the bit with Drag Queen Sam?” “She started to laugh. “You looked like you stepped in poo.” “Even?” “No, you trapped me.” “No, you don’t listen.” “What?” “I told you Jack of Spades last night; today you bet with me. I asked you why you were speaking down to me about try. And, you were so intent on shaming me, you didn’t even think about why, after hurling a dart ten feet, would I want the targets at 60 yards? No, Miss Marie, you were the aggressor and were so intent on showing how good you were, you could not see the obvious. Pride cometh.” “You talk too much.” giving him a full frontal, X rated, hide the little children’s eyes, dental exam that sent wee willie to attention on deck. “Bet that curtain rod won’t shrink back for a half hour!” she grinned devilishly. He couldn’t win. She knew very little about just how fast wee willie could turn on and off.
He had to demonstrate the move a dozen times for Isabella. She asked Marie to learn it. And, helped her thru the steps and turns. She had her hands on Marie a lot correcting her. And, she demonstrated components of the move. Sam saw John watching the girls as they were watching him. At some point, Isabella was done. They hurled no darts, but they were ‘done’. Sam said “John, you are truly an amazing fellow. Probably the strangest fellow I have ever heard of. Marie is also amazing, but maybe just a smidge less than you. I’ve told Isabella what you’ve done for me. Care to do your Sven act on her?” John felt real fear from Isabella. “No. She really doesn’t want it done. She’s like Jody and has issues that she thinks are hidden. And, you, my reborn friend, didn’t tell her your whole story that Sven revealed. Else she wouldn’t be so fearful.” The three of them looked like were caught robbing from the poor box. John said nothing more. It was Isabella that broke the silence. “Speaker John, I don’t know what to say.”
John thought for moment and said “Vous ne devez dire rien. Je n’emploie jamais mon acte de Sven pour blesser des personnes. Je maintiens ces secrets sacrés. Votre père doit vraiment vous blesser en ne prêtant pas l’attention à vous du tout. Vous m’avez enseigné que à jamais faites cela avec mes enfants. Merci de ce cadeau. Le Sam et le Marie ne parlent rien mais anglais.”
(You don’t have to say anything. I never use my Sven act to hurt people. I keep these secrets sacred. Your father must really hurt you by not paying attention to you at all. You’ve taught me to never do that with my children. Thank you for this gift. Sam and Marie don’t speak anything but English.)
John continued ” … … but it is rude to speak that way. If a person who speaks two languages is called bi-lingual. And, a person who speaks three languages is called tri-lingual. What do you call a person who speaks only one language?” Silence. “Anyone?” Sam said “mono-lingual?” John laughed, “No. An American. We only learn one language for the most part and can’t speak like a European.” Isabella giggled. “Marie, how do you keep his head from exploding? Do you have a box you keep him in?” Marie turned bright red and Sam started laughing hysterically. John said “Vous avez dit la ‘boîte ‘; c’est un idiome pour le vagin.”
She started to laugh. “I’m sure he’d like you to continue to keep him there.” John said “No you don’t understand. Here, pre-martial sex is forbidden.” “No? How do boys and girls learn?” “Trial and error when the pressure gets too much.” “That’s crazy.” “No that’s American parochial education”. “Marie, you didn’t mention he’s so funny, so diverse, an so … … how you say “Sexuellement libéré et ouvrez-vous occupé” “sexually liberated and open minded”. Marie groused, “yes, he’s just a bundle of fun.” Isabella continued “And you have no idea if he will satisfy you, yet you’ve pledged to him?” Marie was now brighter than bright red. John stepped in and said “Isabella, unless you want Marie to stroke out, you can’t ask sexual questions. It’s just not done here.” “Sorry, I thought it was just the Nuns who had such views. Marie, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I didn’t know. Have I made another mistake? With Sam, I was going to … …” John said: :Ahhh, Miss Isabella, Yes, sorry Sam; that’s not how it’s done here. You need to spend some time with Miss June alone and she can give you some insights.” “Very strange.”
The Lurp team came and cut off that discussion. Marie came over to John and said: “Bet you wish we were in France! But how did you know?” “She put her hands on you.” “You are amazing. Why did that give it away?” “Let’s just say she’s has experimented with women, decided she likes boys better, and so has no inhibition about a touch being mistaken as a sexual advance.” “So she now has naked pictures of me?” “No, she’s not a visual. She’s a kinesthetic; like June. That’s why I sent her to her. She doesn’t need or want pictures. She’s memorized your body. If she was interested, she could feel your naked body any time she was interested.” Marie was back to bright red. “But, she’s not interested.” John was laughing.
Sam ran the Lurp thru their paces. Advance and retreat. Side scans. Fire line. John was bored. So, focused his radar on the L’s. But for some reason, he couldn’t focus. He went a looked at the result of his prodigious hurl. The dart actual entered the concrete wall. If he was smart, he’d be able to calculate the force it hit with. If anyone saw this, they’d know it was his. “Marie, I need you, please.” She did the quick step. “Are you OK?” “I think so. Your FFT paper. Was it juried?” “Yes.” “And was it published?” “Yes.” “And, was it included in whatever that Mathematical index thing is called?” “Yes.” “We can tell out Vermont friends who you are?” “Are you out of your mind?” “Yes, we have you use your FFT abstract to train the best twelve in coding strange and unfamiliar text.” “Our VT ears will hear the abstract, recognize it, look it up, and they know your name! Sweet!!” “How do you think of this stuff?” “Marie, you may love me, but you’ve never figured out how I tick. If you did, you’d know I’m a very rare bird. I told everyone I was a biograph. But no one, even you, never asked what a biograph was. It was like I said I was Democrat. I am a freak. I really have what you think of as multiple brains. Not split personalities; simultaneous thinking. With some odd wiring. I have to add that to the plan. Adjutant! Thanks for being here. Take a message to Master Brian. Tell him to amend the Kabuki plan to include Miss Marie’s FFT. Got that? Thank you.”
Jeopardy
The 11AM Jeopardy Drill was more of the same.
Sam repeated the order of march.
First Lurp. Brother Kevin #2 Isabella #3 Lisa and Linda doing #1 and #4 doing all the running.
Second, Marie and John.
Third, the mob!
Driving Team #1 Master David (6), Master Brandon (6), and Master Jude (6) under the direction of Miss Taylor (7).
Driving Team #2 - Miss Sarah (6), Miss Julia (6), and Miss Olivia (5) under the direction of Miss Destiny (7).
Recovery #1 - Master Alexander, Miss Brianna, Miss Elizabeth, and Miss Madison under the direction of Master TomT.
Finally Roy and Jody with Boy Scout James always in the middle.
The paraded around the room in their dance. After each circuit, they’d repeat the Sequence of Operations.
To the garage for transport.
DT#1, Marie, Roy, and James go to the depot.
Lurp goes to Pawn.
TomT & team recover the garage.
John, Jody, TomT & Team, and DT#2 go to pawn. Get guns and anything useful.
Lurp moves to Radio Shack.
TomT & team recover the Pawn Shop.
Move to depot.
Pick’em up and run for home.
Hit opposition, e&e as best you can.
Sam was sure they knew what they wanted to do. He also knew that plans never last past the first bullet.
+++++
Trek
John signed Sam after the Jeopardy drill. “What can we do for three days about the trek? Once we actually move to the bases part of the plan, we won’t have the shelter to practice in. We should at least do what you’ve thought of for Lurp and Jeopardy.”
Sam said “We can get every one used to where they are supposed to be. Everyone should know where they belong so we don’t spend a lot of time exposed getting organized. The Order of March: Scout1 (BK&Sam), Scout2 (DT1), Food1 (DT3), Food2 (DT4), Fuel (DT5), ‘Empty” (DT6), Opt1 (DT8), Opt2 (DT9), Bus (DT7), Rear1 (DT2), Rear2 (John & Marie) is easy to get established.
+++++
Dinner
John went to the front after June’s Grace After Meals. He said “Classmates: We need to practice for our trek to Vermont. Would all the Trek Driving teams line up. Miss Marie is in the last car. That’s my grandfather’s 57 Ford. Hot! The car; I know Miss Marie is hot. For those that haven’t been paying attention, please start. OK, let’s do it.”
And the fire drill began.
It took about fifteen minutes to get it lined up. Which was not bad. They were used to lining up. Everyone thought it was funny to see them parade around the room.
John had them line up in the center and he gave them the dispersal order, They’d march forward to John. Odds went left; evens right. Then he taught them that the first truck takes the first major road that resumes the desired direction. When he was finished they were lined up in parallel lines.
He hoped that it would never come to it. But, if they could remember this drill, then maybe they’d make it.
+++++
TV
Marie’s Song
Marie stepped to the front. The crowd exuded their love for her. She spoke quietly but firmly to them with love:
“I know that there were some before Church Day who questioned what I saw in a person that they perceived as a fat loser. I never fought with them, I just would say, ‘you don’t know him like I do.’ They didn’t know him.”
“Church Day made us all different people. I saw a boy stride out the side door, I thought leaving me to my fate. A man strode back in and in my opinion single-handedly saved many of us. That was him saying to me ‘you don’t know me like I do’. I thought my life was ending when he went down.”
“Exit Day is coming.”
“It’s no secret that John and I have been coding for years under the Nun’s noses. It’s no secret at least to me that he hates war and violence. It’s no secret to me that he will defend me. There’s a difference between starting a fight and finishing it.”
“Early in our relationship, he told me of a Civil War song of a girl who wanted to follow her man. I wondered what would induce a young girl to follow her man into Hell and make her willing to kill. We women don’t kill; we bring life into the world. I was but a child and thought as a child.”
“There is evil in the world. Church Day demonstrated that bad men will start a fight. They hurt, rape, and kill. They must be opposed and resisted with all one’s might. That’s finishing the fight. Now I am a young woman and think as a young woman.”
“I know now what brings a woman to fight, to kill, and perhaps to die with her man. It’s love. Love so strong that you can’t imagine being without your beloved. It’s seeing evil and resisting it. No matter the odds.”
“On Exit Day, I will follow John out to Vermont or Hell whichever we find first. I will fight. And will kill if I have to. Because evil has to be opposed. Because from now on I’ll finish every fight. Because I can’t imagine being without him. Now I am old beyond my years and think as an old woman.”
“Here’s the song that he use to try to teach me that lesson. A Cruel War!”
The cruel war is raging
Johnny has to fight
I want to be with him
From morning till night
I’m counting the minutes
The hours and the days,
Oh Lord, stop the cruel war,
For this, my heart prays.
I made my decision,
I will join up too,
Oh Johnny, dear Johnny,
I’ll soon be with you.
We women are fighters,
We can help you win,
Oh Johnny, I’m hoping,
That they’ll take me in
.
The cruel war is raging
Johnny has to fight
I want to be with him
From morning till night
“An old woman, me, who has seen evil and death, asks you: Aren’t all wars cruel?” Marie wept for all the dead and those she knew would die.
And so did the audience.
Poem
John stepped up to follow. He walked to her and put his arm around her. She was visible bolstered by his touch.
“Now I’m just a drying out drunk. And, you might find it hard to believe, but as a good Protestant boy of stout English stock - that’s how my maternal grandmother viewed me - the half German, the Catholic school, the endless time in detention doing punishments didn’t change that view of me - made sure I knew King James. The King James Bible that is. None of that Douay-Rheims trickery for her grandson.”
“Back before Church Day, if wasn’t paying attention at school prayers, the Lord’s prayer would end with ‘for Thyne is the Power and the Glory.’ And a Papist Brother would punish me for that Protestant heresy. It always stuck me as odd that two groups of people who both worshiped the Prince of Peace not only would fight wars, but could not even agree on the words of the Lord’s Prayer.”
“So she made me memorize the King James. And certain verses stuck. In my dissension into drink, sin, and even you might say madness, some of those verses were life preservers. Then I met Marie and many just lock into place for me. Here’s one:”
Ecclesiastes 3
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?
I have seen the travail, which God hath given to the sons of men to be exercised in it.
He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.
I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.
And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God.
I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him.
That which hath been is now; and that which is to be hath already been; and God requireth that which is past.
And moreover I saw under the sun the place of judgment, that wickedness was there; and the place of righteousness, that iniquity was there.
I said in mine heart, God shall judge the righteous and the wicked: for there is a time there for every purpose and for every work.
I said in mine heart concerning the estate of the sons of men, that God might manifest them, and that they might see that they themselves are beasts.
For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.
All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.
Who knoweth the spirit of man that goeth upward, and the spirit of the beast that goeth downward to the earth?
Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?
“Thank you for your kind attentention and I bid thee good night.”
John didn’t hear the applause. He only felt Marie, and wondered which time was this.”
+++++
Staff Meeting
John admitted that he just didn’t have the energy to “do” staff meetings and more. He said: “This is just too much for me. I can’t do it tonight. I’m tired. Mentally tired. Is there any thing that has to be done?”
Sam said: “John, we have to talk about what you showed me. I have some stuff to tell you about Isabella. But it can wait.” “You want my ok. She’s older, lived in France, and wants to have sex with you to know if you are … ’suitable marriage material’. You want my approval?” “Listen, Sven, you are the closest thing to a priest or a psychiatrist we have here. What should I do?” John was really tired. “Sam, yesterday, you thought you were a homosexual. Today, you’re ready to poke a girl you don’t know. Do you think maybe you’re rushing?”
“Tell you what ; tell her: ‘Quand je peux parler français et savoir les adresses des grand-pères d’Isabella, alors je peux avoir le sexe.’ When you know the answer, then you can have sex. OK?”
Sam said “As long as I’m not telling her to kick me in the nuts. That still hurts.”
John laughed weekly.
+++++
Time with Marie
He put his arm around Marie. They walked to the Queen’s Corner in silence. She arranged the blankets and they sat together. She was worried. Was Isabella a rival? John had that stare again. She said: “John, are you OK. You’re scaring me. Do you need to have sex? Is it like Isabella said; the pressure is too great?”
John was spent. He pulled all his energy up to his head. “Miss Marie, Would you really sacrifice your virginity for me? Because some girl from France with different values wants Sam. Why are you threatened? Wee willie doesn’t do the thinking for me. I picked you of all the girls in the world. I could have had sex innumerable times in the Village with boys or girls. I have tried to show you the depth of my world. I’ve told you my secrets. I’m just burnt out from leading. I need you to nestle in and recharge me with your love. I need that, which you get and give to others, your magic. I’m just so tired.”
Marie did as asked and played Eve to his Adam. He was asleep in minutes. She was now very afraid. If he broke down, could they get to Vermont. She knew the Shelter would look to her to lead. She wasn’t a leader; she was a nurturer. She cried and prayed silently. “dear saint taq, come around, my hero has deflated and i’m confused. show me the way. is it sex? Or something else? A confused woman. She went to sleep waiting for the answer that would never come. (As summoned, Saint Taq reviewed the events of the day. John was certainly burning the emotional candle at many ends. Each time he would read for someone, Taq knew he invested a lot of love in that person. The children didn’t know that you can’t love everyone. Marie’s gift was the endless supply of the very thing John needed — love. His tank would be full by morning. Marie didn’t know that she too had a need. She needed John’s demand to keep her supply of love fresh. Unrequited love was corrosive. If she didn’t have John to empty her tank each night, she’d become sour and bitter. That’s why ‘nesting’ felt so good. Silly children, not everything is about sex. That’s why Marie would make a great Mom. She was a font of love. Saint Taq, petitioned the Lord to help John and Marie understand human love. As the reflection of the Lord’s love for his children. Sex had nothing to do with anything.)
# # # # #
